Endocrinologist

On last Thursday, we had our 1st endocrinologist consult. Basically, he said this could be absolutely nothing at all OR Lucas has a rare genetic mutation which means he will have rickets for the rest of his life. All I heard was there is a chance Lucas will have a reduced quality of life with possible issues with even standing or walking. The doctor said we will not have a final diagnosis for 3 plus months. He wants us to take some additional blood & urine tests. As soon as we walked out of the doctor’s office, I started crying. I felt overwhelmed and frightened for Lucas. Bryan held me & did everything to make me smile & not give up hope.

Later on in the evening, I started bawling and told Bryan that I was actually angry at God. Bryan decided we were calling Bob (Papa) & Peggy (Nani) to talk this out. Crazy timing. Bob & Peggy were just starting their bible study at the house. Peggy answered the phone & quickly said she wanted us to share our fears with the group so she put us on speaker phone. While crying, I explained to the group that I was angry at the Lord for once again bringing another issue Lucas’ way. We already dealt with my water breaking at 26 weeks, giving birth at 34 weeks, a large surgery at day 1 of life, a blood transfusion, and a few months of blood issues. Still fighting the cdiff and lower stricture issue. Now, we may have a life long medical issue with rickets?!?! How can these constant issues be a part of God’s plan? When will we finally get a break? I have held it together and rarely cry. Whenever something goes wrong, I immediately looks towards making a game plan and don’t shed a tear. This time, I felt like it was too much & I was ready to break! Then, a small group member named Yemi said a powerful prayer. She prayed the Lord would take away our fears and fill our hearts with hope. Don’t forget the Lord is right by our sides walking this road with us. At the end of this road, we will see the light and look back and finally see all of the Lord’s blessings. For now, we can not give up hope. The Lord is almighty. He will not forsake us. Such a powerful & uplifting prayer! As soon as we hung up the phone, I felt inspired and even thanked the Lord for giving us the small group at the very moment I was ready to break. The Lord has amazing timing indeed!

May our story be an inspiration to others of the power of Jesus Christ. He does not promise you a perfect life if you are a follower. But he promises us peace and his strength. As one of my favorite Christian songs says, “your grace is enough”!

13 thoughts on “Endocrinologist

  1. It’s cliche I know but true, God doesn’t give us more than we can handle. My Grandma always said that the devil tries to come in when we are the lowest and that’s when we need to be the strongest. I’m praying so hard for you and your little family. I just know that he will be o.k. In my heart I know it to be true. Love you and hope you feel more in control as I know you are not a crier or someone who “loses it” so it was your moment for God to show you how loving and strong your husband is and also your chance to push the devil back out and pull God back in. Much love!!

    ~Jen Vazquez Godiva LabradorsLife’s Abundance Representative408-889-3303

    http://www.godivalabradors.com

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    Date: Wed, 9 Apr 2014 02:36:53 +0000 To: jcjenvaz@gmail.com

    • Your grandma was a very smart woman. The devil definetly tried to make his way into my heart on that day. But the Lord is stronger. Thank you for the constant support and prayers. You have been such a wonderful friend through this all. Thank you!!!

  2. I heard this last week, “God hasn’t made a mistake yet, and he isn’t starting with you. ”

    Your story has an impact already and we don’t even know the next chapter.

  3. I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR FEARS, BUT KEEP STRONG, THE LORD WILL CONTINUE TO WALK BY YOUR SIDE. YOU BOTH HAVE BEEN VERY BRAVE, ESPECIALLY LITTLE LUCAS. WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE THE LOWS JUST LOOK INTO THE EYES OF LITTLE LUCAS, HIS SMILE WILL GIVE YOU THE ADDITIONAL STRENGTH YOU NEED.

    • Lucas does give us all the strength we need to keep fighting. It is wonderful to know he is happy & enjoying his life. He loves waving at the drs and nurses. He always lifts up their spirits.

  4. thank you for sharing this… it is good to know where you are in good times and bad. then we can be praying for all three of you more intently. we love you guys so much. and know that lucas’s past present and future is firmly planted in God’s perfect hands. big big hugs!

    • I agree with Jina! Thank you for being so vulnerable Jill. I think it’s hard to see hope sometimes when the room feels so dark – but even the tiniest sliver of light will show up in the darkest of rooms. We love you guys!

      • Thanks Ale. It isn’t always easy sharing such difficult moments. But I feel like the Lord wants our story to be told. Maybe someday Lucas’ story will be an inspiration for another baby.

  5. I wrote to Bryan last year about how I felt with what my dad is going through, and how I felt very much at peace when I realized that I did not have to be strong, but that Someone was that strength for me and would take up this heavy cross I could not bear.

    This endocrinologist reminds me of someone we had to deal with before our first daughter was born. They carried out a number of standard genetic tests and the doctor (who did not have much of a background in genetics — or humanity for that matter!) told us there was a chance Isabella would either have cystic fibrosis or be sterile. After the initial shock, it took a lot of research on our part to find that the doctor was incorrect on both counts, and should not have even presented the results that way even if they had been understood correctly. The next OB/GYN we found was better. I pray the next person you talk to is more sensible and helpful.

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